Friday, December 04, 2015

Revealings Of An Ex FTM

I have been ridiculed more by a community that I have fought hard to advocate for and defend, than by those that did not understand my plight in the first place. I have received death threats, my livelihood affected from those in the trans community, when they harassed my once sponsors and had them removed, all because I questioned the trans narrative and its validity. I was once known as a hero to many, having done countless documentaries, TV Shows, Books, Panels, Seminars, you name it, I did it all, but now I am known as a transphobe, hater and have been discredited. all because I sing a different tune these days.
I have been struggling with the whole transgender thing for a while now, but the more I learned about this community, after countless interviews with many, after seeing their behavior, and finally after much research, I have come to the conclusion that this is nothing more than a self gratification trend. Yes, there are some people that really suffer, they don't want to be the gender they were born as, but you know what, there are people in the world that don't like many things about them or their lives and they have to deal with it. Somehow, this has become a medicalized trap, and the trans community is getting away with their plight.

Before hormones and surgeries, people lived, they just did, but now that pandoras box has opened, trans has become the plague of the century, and the worse condition ever according to them. Well I am here to tell you that is BS, you lived with this before, you can live with it again. Be honest and say you don't want to, you enjoy doing what you are being allowed to do now, getting away from your responsibilities and playing a 6 year old child, playing dress up, and having fun. Sure who wouldn't want to run away and live in fairy land?
Any way, I am here to say, that no, the earth won't stop spinning if we don't get to live as the opposite gender we were born as, it may suck at times to feel different, but we need to learn that different is just fine. We can create a life for ourselves that is not destructive to everyone else around us and ourselves in the long run. How many trans individuals have lost it all in the quest to transition? They have destroyed everything they built and their families, it is the common theme amongst us all.
I can name quite the losses I had, starting from my singing voice, to my long curly hair, my self confidence (Maritza was fierce, strong and had so much wisdom), my business, my career, and my respect. Mark did not have the same gusto and focus that Maritza had, I felt like an imposter, I became an attention whore, I took on the energy that Maritza hated the most, that male driven agenda that destroys everything it touches. Maritza will return to her entirety, maybe not her looks, but her heart and soul will completely return after the healing  has taken place.
A word of advice to those pursuing transition, if you are not prepared to lose it all, then don't do it. If you think you are gaining something better, think again. After the honeymoon passes and the fun ends, you will be left with regret, anger, and sadness. In spite of it all, I really feel for the trans community, as angry as many of them have made me with their lies and witch hunts, I can still have compassion and feel sad for them, they are being led by a force that cannot  be reasoned with, but there will come a day, when they will look back and say, wow, she was right.
When we learn that what is wrong with us is not our gender, but our quest for happiness in whatever form that takes, we can clearly look back at all of our stages and behaviors and see the pattern. It is not transition of our body that is needed, instead a transition of our mind and hearts in the search of love and peace. 

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