Wednesday, December 09, 2015

Who Are We Kidding?

Ritz then with Dad and Auntie

Video after video, transition after transition, these extremely sad individuals who will stop at nothing to accomplish the fairy tale in their minds, are not for one minute stopping to see what it is that they are actually doing.  Who in their right mind, will destroy their genitals in the attempts to have another created? Now I am not trying to make fun or disrespect anyone, I am just trying to rap my head at the practice that many, including myself underwent, believing we can be a different biology from the one we were born as. 
Watching the creation being made, their voices, attitudes and persona change, as if taking on a role in a New York production on Broadway. It is so fake and unnatural. I look back at my own pictures as Mark, hair chest, sprouted beard, muscles and of coarse the swagger that demanded respect, yet, it was all a creation, a false notion, no different than getting into character before entering the stage. The stage in this situation is life, where these young men and women want to play their role in Hollywood, have their 15 minutes of fame. If their interest was really to "fix" their gender dysphoria, why are they always in the lime light, promoting their newly made character and flashy new name?
Instead of trying to make it into People's magazine or in the front page of Mens Fitness, these so called gender dysphoria soldiers would lay low, live a productive life in the role they transition to, and not be as demanding, boisterous and harmful to the gender they claim they are. 

After 13 years living as Mark, I learned many things, and one of these real important things I learned was that no matter what a person does to change their outside, they will always be the same on the inside. If you want change, change needs to come from within, learning to care for others, be a bright light for the darkness and stop being so self centered, something this trans community is all about, I know I was. 
Mark the Character

I learn that no matter what I did to my exterior, I was still a woman, always will be, can't change that, nor would I want to. I learn the world of men and how much I really do not want to be part of it. I believe that what I have learn will help me help others, I see life totally different now and I am proud of my return. My advice to trans folks is stop trying to change the world and your exterior, be happy with who you are, if you want to change, change the things like the lack of self love and conditions you place on your happiness, cause in the end when your FFS starts to droop, and your not so new man made vagina or penis starts to malfunction and it served you no purpose, you will look back and wonder what the heck did I do? 
So stop all that energy, worrying and frustrations you are placing on yourself and start doing something productive, like mentoring these gender variant kids and teach them they are perfect the way they are. 

Any how, my detransition progress is going great, still have the occasional headaches from the cessation of Testosterone, still battling with my hair growth on my face and body and the lack of hair on my head, but other than that I feel great. 
Ritz now

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