Friday, January 29, 2016

In The Dark

I remember when I was a small child, everything revolved around gender and stereotypes. I don't know if anyone else has these memories, but my mother made sure I knew I was a girl and focused on providing me with girl things. I was constantly told how wrong I was whenever I engaged in boy play, boy actions and or fought against girl things. I don't know why I did not gravitate towards girly things, but it was the core of my upbringing, the battle between mom and I lasted a life time and to this day, it still does. 
Even after I have detransitioned, my mom is not seeing the results that she would like to see fast enough. I can see the disapproval in her face and demeanor. I know she means well, and I am sure she meant well through out my life, but I believe her push for me to be the girl she gave birth to, actually led to wanting to be more masculine and fight my feminine essence. I find myself now being drawn to more feminine things and can't wait to be seen as a woman, have my long hair back, be able to wear more feminine attire and over all live the remaining years as a woman. 

I think society is at fault for all the confusion and judgment we all face due to our quirkiness. We should all be able to express, experiment and execute our self as we see fit without judgment or ridicule, including from our own parents.  Add religious dogma  to the mix, that plays on people emotions and fears when they do not fit the perfect little gender boxes, is enough to drive people to the opposite direction. If society was less stressed on peoples expression and accepted everyone for who they were, we would not see all the problems we are seeing today. 
I do see improvements, but we have a long way to go. People and their neurosis with what gender is or what sex is suppose to be are only creating internal battles in others which in turn affects everyone on this planet. I say take a chill pill and let people be already. Who cares if a trans person was born the opposite sex they identify as, is it any of your business? Your uterus won't fall off if a trans woman says she is a woman, don't worry they are not asking you for your ovaries to make them complete. No one is trying to take away your womanhood, there are no quotas on earth for the amount of woman allowed, so breath easy you are safe. There is enough room on this planet for trans women and women alike.

Stop playing the biology card, and start realizing there is more to life the sperm and ovum. Oh and for those who claim that I am standing by my "man", if you even knew me, you would know how much of a ball buster and strong headed individual I am. I have come to this completed 180 due to my own detransition, it has allowed me to feel compassion and have a full on understanding of a feeling of being a woman. You may not understand since you have never had to go through this whole cluster fuck of feelings and emotions, but I can tell you this, your nay saying and constant friction helps no one. You don't even know it but you are hurting women as well. There are many women who are born with lots of androgen, they too will be a victim of harassment in their own toilets. So please give it a break and get out of the darkness. Its 2016 we humans are evolving, you don't want to be seen or left to be a dinosaur.  

Life is too precious and our path very difficult to be a thorn in someone else's path. I love you but remember to love yourselves too



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